Its funny how things change owing to circumstances. A dreaded weekend knocks at my door again. And no matter how much I dread it, I gotta live thru it.
I know by now you must be thinking that what’s wrong with me. Dreading a weekend!!!
Well yes a person who used to look forward to weekends & crave for a holiday on a Saturday has been replaced by this person who’s weekend phobic now.
Don’t misconstrue this for having lost the spark in life. Its just that when an empty room devoid of family and friends stares back at you for 2 consecutive days, it gets a little too much.
These are not some lame self pitying emotions. But some facts which very few people who stay away from their hometown would care to admit.
Agreed with all the gyaan, which is avlbl in abundance, that go out, make new friends, and blah blah blah blah.
But somewhere deep down only I know and can really feel what I go thru on a weekend .I miss the luxury of waking up late in my room, miss the late breakfast that only my mom can make the way she makes it, strolling around my house, playing with my niece, marveling at her antics, being bullied by my elder brother, and me in turn taking undue advantage of my second elder brother ,having serious discussions with my dad, and catching up nineteen to dozen with my mom.
Just a small drive around my town makes me feel so connected with it. Every street reminds me of hundreds of things attached to it. I can literally stand on the road and just soak myself in the warmth all around me.
The contentness, the warmth, the peacefulness that I feel there is something, that’s mesmerizing.
Wish that every weekend when I open my eyes I find myself in this world. Only and only if all wishes could come true.
Friday, August 22, 2008
Monday, August 4, 2008
Lets sing the song,we all forgot!!
On with the dance!
Let joy be unconfined;No sleep till morn, when Youth and Pleasure meet
To chase the glowing hours with flying feet.
And that’s exactly what happened this Saturday. A group of friends, lots of food, good ambience & above all a lot of booze. And as is always the case I was a new entrant in this group as well. But the observer in me struck gold this time. I expected a bunch of artificial individuals, on the contrary found what follows underneath.
It’s the gang of friends who know each other since college. They have been there, done that & may be more than that. Practically spent every day of a year together. And now today they stand in front of each other with a gap of years spent in different directions. But is there really a gap!!
Simrat (the hostess):Tomboy turned hottie. Just broke up after 7 years of being in a relationship. As expected shattered beyond words. But putting on a brave front. Tries to pull a combination of being the gud hostess, enjoying herself, dancing away merrily, bit of flirting around. But just when she thinks no1’s luking takes a deep breath & carries on.
Simrat 7 years is a long time. Suppressing it wont help, boozing will help you temporarily.But people like you who have nerves of steel find their way out.So will you.
Subbu: The girl who just got married. Now people if you really want to be inspired,heres her story. She liked some1 from dis gang itself in college days.But the guy did not reciprocate. As fate wud have it, the guy proposed to her this year and today they are happily married.She has got everything today that she always dreamt of.The guy she luvd,a settled life.But she has lost herself in the process.She craves to break free,prove herself,claim a separate identity for herself. The guy loves her,no denying that.But when love from one side weighs much more than the other, the other person starts controlling your emotions without you even realizing it.
Subbu,you will go places. Just don’t let your spirit die cos of unreturned emotions. He really does luv you.
Raje: The face says it all. A guy who means no harm, has done no harm. The quintessentially nice guy. Gets married. The inner turmoil takes over.
Raje the inner turmoil will destroy you. Get it out of your system. Deal with it. Only you will ever understand your helplessness. We do, & we wud do nethng to get you out of it, but in the end you know its your inner battle.
Addu: Simple life or is it!The no hang ups guy. Happily married, well settled guy. Luvs his wife, likes his job, does the routine going out stuff. And life has been ‘so far so gud’.
Only if mother & daughter in law cud deal vth their stuff on their own.
Jerry: Self proclaimed ladies man!Lifes one big party,& everyone,just bout everyones invited.Theres a hole in his sole, but you aren’t supposed to see it.One incident after the other,and wat you have today is the aftermath.A jerry,who can be as artificial as you want him to be,as rude and hurting as you wud want in a nitemare.Hurts the close ones & makes outsiders happy.Irony,haven’t seen a better guy than him.How?He will just travel to your hometown,to make you see a place,wich you are longing to see.Y?Cos deres no1 in your hometown who wud take you dere.Just one small eg.
Hides his real self behind such layers that it becums difficult to find out the real one.Alcohol entered his life wen he needed someone the most. And the romance hasn’t stopped since then.
And now when someones knocking at his door, requesting to replace the alcohol, begging him to take her in,he stands dere facing the biggest decision of his life.
Me: The perennial outsider. Strangely feeling at home.Looking at all of dem vth sober eyes and mind. Happy in deir happiness. If only for the nite,nd if only after so much alcohol in their systems,they can sing the song they had forgotten & dance the nite away,den God bless them vth more such nites.Nothing,absolutely nothing compares vth the feeling of seeing that twinkle alive in your loved one’s eyes.
Amen to the thought & more such nights!!
Let joy be unconfined;No sleep till morn, when Youth and Pleasure meet
To chase the glowing hours with flying feet.
And that’s exactly what happened this Saturday. A group of friends, lots of food, good ambience & above all a lot of booze. And as is always the case I was a new entrant in this group as well. But the observer in me struck gold this time. I expected a bunch of artificial individuals, on the contrary found what follows underneath.
It’s the gang of friends who know each other since college. They have been there, done that & may be more than that. Practically spent every day of a year together. And now today they stand in front of each other with a gap of years spent in different directions. But is there really a gap!!
Simrat (the hostess):Tomboy turned hottie. Just broke up after 7 years of being in a relationship. As expected shattered beyond words. But putting on a brave front. Tries to pull a combination of being the gud hostess, enjoying herself, dancing away merrily, bit of flirting around. But just when she thinks no1’s luking takes a deep breath & carries on.
Simrat 7 years is a long time. Suppressing it wont help, boozing will help you temporarily.But people like you who have nerves of steel find their way out.So will you.
Subbu: The girl who just got married. Now people if you really want to be inspired,heres her story. She liked some1 from dis gang itself in college days.But the guy did not reciprocate. As fate wud have it, the guy proposed to her this year and today they are happily married.She has got everything today that she always dreamt of.The guy she luvd,a settled life.But she has lost herself in the process.She craves to break free,prove herself,claim a separate identity for herself. The guy loves her,no denying that.But when love from one side weighs much more than the other, the other person starts controlling your emotions without you even realizing it.
Subbu,you will go places. Just don’t let your spirit die cos of unreturned emotions. He really does luv you.
Raje: The face says it all. A guy who means no harm, has done no harm. The quintessentially nice guy. Gets married. The inner turmoil takes over.
Raje the inner turmoil will destroy you. Get it out of your system. Deal with it. Only you will ever understand your helplessness. We do, & we wud do nethng to get you out of it, but in the end you know its your inner battle.
Addu: Simple life or is it!The no hang ups guy. Happily married, well settled guy. Luvs his wife, likes his job, does the routine going out stuff. And life has been ‘so far so gud’.
Only if mother & daughter in law cud deal vth their stuff on their own.
Jerry: Self proclaimed ladies man!Lifes one big party,& everyone,just bout everyones invited.Theres a hole in his sole, but you aren’t supposed to see it.One incident after the other,and wat you have today is the aftermath.A jerry,who can be as artificial as you want him to be,as rude and hurting as you wud want in a nitemare.Hurts the close ones & makes outsiders happy.Irony,haven’t seen a better guy than him.How?He will just travel to your hometown,to make you see a place,wich you are longing to see.Y?Cos deres no1 in your hometown who wud take you dere.Just one small eg.
Hides his real self behind such layers that it becums difficult to find out the real one.Alcohol entered his life wen he needed someone the most. And the romance hasn’t stopped since then.
And now when someones knocking at his door, requesting to replace the alcohol, begging him to take her in,he stands dere facing the biggest decision of his life.
Me: The perennial outsider. Strangely feeling at home.Looking at all of dem vth sober eyes and mind. Happy in deir happiness. If only for the nite,nd if only after so much alcohol in their systems,they can sing the song they had forgotten & dance the nite away,den God bless them vth more such nites.Nothing,absolutely nothing compares vth the feeling of seeing that twinkle alive in your loved one’s eyes.
Amen to the thought & more such nights!!
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